This post is linked to Tempt My Tummy Tuesday.

I am shocked!  Shocked, I say, at the lack of response to this lovely weekly linky of mine!  I have to tell you, you don’t know what you’re missing out on if you aren’t teaching a child to cook!  Sally Mae and I have the best times in the kitchen!  Even after only three weeks we’re so much closer than before!  She thinks I hung the moon and wants to be just like me!

You want some of that  from your child?  Take them into the kitchen and help ‘em learn the ropes!  Make it fun.  Let ‘em taste stuff and make messes.  Choose easy, delicious (& forgiving) recipes and you can hardly miss!

Ask Becky! She knows what I’m talkin’ about!

This week I actually had a hard time figuring out what we would cook.  I have been too busy to go to the grocery on my regular day (or any other day), so we had to make do with what was on hand.  It’s a good thing that nuts and chocolate chips are standard pantry items here at the ranch!

Learning about the mixer.

Her first shot at crackin’ eggs.  The first one got all over her hands and the counter.  She did great on the second one!

Funny girl!

The boring part.

The boring part took a little doing.

The pay off!

I’m calling this week’s recipe -

Trail Mix Cookie Bars

You’ll need:

• 1 cup butter
• 1 cup sugar
• 2 eggs
• 1 tsp vanilla
• 1¼ cup flour (all purpose or unbleached)
• 1½ cups oats (we used old fashioned)
• 1 tsp baking soda
• 2 cups chocolate chips (or so, depending on how many “disappear” while being measured)
• ½ – 1 cup of chopped nuts (we used honey roasted mixed nuts and ran ‘em through the handy chopper)
• You could add some cinnamon or nutmeg or ginger if ya want.  We didn’t.

Preheat your oven to 375° and spray some oil into your 9×13.

Cream the butter and sugar.  Add the eggs, beat some more.  Add the vanilla, beat some more.

Add the remaining ingredients and stir by hand.  Keep it simple.  Mix it all in just one bowl.

Spread the dough into the 9×13.  Smooth it out all the way to the edges and corners.  Take your time.  It’s fairly forgiving, just don’t try to press hard or it’ll just stick to the spoon!

Bake at 375° for 25 minutes.  Let it cool a bit before cutting into bars.  We like to use our pizza cutter for this kind of job.

Now it’s your turn!

I’d love for you to participate in my linky!  Once you’ve written your post about teaching your child to cook include a link to this post and then come back here and sign up on the MckLinky.

If you like, you may put my banner in your post.

Although it’s not required, I’d sure be tickled to see my button in your sidebar when I visit your blog.

It’s too soon to take off from regular daily life (school) but it already feels so much like Christmas I’ve  got that antsy, chompin’ at the bit, rarin’ to go Christmas spirit.

I’m sure it’s due to the cold weather.  Funny that those of us who live in south Texas even have a “White Christmas” expectation.  I think it’s due to tv specials that teach us that for a really and truly home-style Christmas there will be snow, and all contrary weather is a big let down.

Well, we got our sweaters on now, so it must be Christmas!

The other thing that is prompting this Holiday feel is that the big three Cowboys have been goin’ to work with Hubs every day.  Weird, that.  It’s a neat deal for the littles to have me to themselves for the whole day, and at the same time, it’s a whole ton of work for me since my plan depends on a certain amount of assistance from those big Cowboys.  I even had to carry laundry baskets and put away my own groceries and water rabbits all by me onesie.  (Sorry - channeling Jack Sparrow for a second there!  {hi, carri})

The point is, it’s just odd here.  I am seriously considering taking the day off from school and just baking cookies and making cocoa.  I think I will!

Want my horribly sinful sugar cookie recipe?  It’s so bad for you, in many ways, but it’s the very tastiest cookie and stands up to little helpers wielding rolling pins and cookie cutters and the dreaded SPRINKLES!  (sprinkles are nasty, imo)  But these cookies are the BOSS of all sugar cookies!

Trail Boss Sugar Cookies

• 1 cup butter flavor Crisco (If your store is out or the butter flavor you can use plain.)
• 1½ cups granulated sugar
• ½ cup brown sugar
• 3 eggs
• 2 T milk
• 1 t vanilla
• 4 – 5 cups all-purpose flour
• 1½ t baking soda
• 1½ t cream of tartar (If you don’t have any, go ahead and omit.  It doesn’t make a huge difference.)
• 1 t salt

In a large bowl cream the Crisco and the sugars together.  Beat in the eggs, one at a time.  Add the milk and vanilla, mix well.

In a medium bowl combine the flour, baking soda, cream of tartar and salt.  Give it a stir and mix it into the creamed mixture a ¼ at a time.  Mix well.  Cover the cookie dough, put it in the fridge and chill for an hour while sipping hot cocoa!

After you’ve enjoyed your cocoa, go clean the kitchen.  It needs it and you’ll have more room to work with hot trays of cookies coming out of the oven if you just clean up now, go, do.

Heat the oven to 350°F.  Roll out half of the dough at a time, to about ¼” thickness on a floured surface.  Cut with cookie cutters.  My favorites are the star, bell and tree.

Place the cookies about 2″ apart on an un-greased cookie sheet.  Bake for about 6-7 minutes until edges are golden.  Remove immediately to a rack or tea towel laid on the table.

And speaking of your table, do the whole job there if you can.  It’s so much easier for the elves to help you if they can climb up into the chairs and work at the table than trying to work around the chairs they are gonna want to bring into the kitchen so they can reach the counter.

Now, you may ask, “Why, Mother Hen?  Why do you prefer the star, bell and tree cookie cutters over all the others?”

So, I’ll tell ya.  The star, bell, and tree cookies can be frosted (and look lovely) with un-colored frosting.  I may be willing to allow my kids to eat these cookies even though they have Crisco, sugar and white flour in them, but I draw the line at adding food coloring to the frosting!   Of course, you can use any cookie cutter you want, I know we’ll use a bazillion different ones.

And the hidden benefit of using only un-colored frosting is that it’s just simpler.  I won’t have to deal with a zillion little bowls of  differently colored frosting.  Yay!

Buttery Cream Frosting

• 4 cups confectioners sugar (Deep breath, remember, it’s just for Christmas!)
• ½ cup butter flavored Crisco
• 1½ t vanilla
• 6-7 T milk

In a medium bowl (Aren’t you glad you cleaned the kitchen a little while ago?) combine the first three ingredients.  Slowly blend in the milk to the consistency you like.  Then beat on high speed for five minutes.

Now, have some fun watching your elves frost the cookies!

Be sure you let the cookies cool all the way before you frost them.  Also, let the frosting dry all the way before you try to put them into a cookie jar or a ziplock bag.

Linked to Tempt my Tummy Tuesday and Chickens in the Road.

Too.many.apples.in.my.fridge!

Must.bake.apple.crumb.cobbler.right.away!

Preheat your oven to 350° and grease your 9 x 13 pan.

You’ll need:

• 2 cups flour
• 2 cups oats
• 1 t cinnamon
• ½ t nutmeg
• ½ t salt
• 1½ cups brown sugar
• 3 sticks butter (1½ cups)
• 6 cups peeled, cored and sliced apples

In your large bowl combine the flour, oats, cinnamon, nutmeg, salt and brown sugar.  Cut the butter into the flour mixture using two knives or a pastry cutter.

Press half of the crumb mixture into the 9 x 13 pan.  Next add the apples.  Top it off with the other half of the crumb mixture, just sprinkle it on, don’t press this time.

Bake at 350° for about 45 – 50 minutes until the apples are tender.

Serve it hot with ice cream or cold by itself.  Yum!

This is Hubs’ favorite cake.  I should really make it more often, ‘cuz it’s very easy and homemade cake is rather frugal to boot!

Preheat your oven to 350° and grease your 9 x 13 pan.

You’ll need:

• 1 can crushed pineapple
• ¼ cup butter, melted
• 1 cup brown sugar
• 3 cups all purpose flour
• 5 tsp baking powder
• 1 cup butter
• 1½ cups white sugar
• 2 eggs
• 1 Tbsp vanilla

Drain the pineapple but reserve the liquid.  Mix ¼ cup melted butter w/ the brown sugar, 2 Tbsp of the reserved liquid and the drained pineapple.  Spread it in the pan.

To the rest of the reserved liquid add enough water to make 1 & 1/3 cup.  Set this aside.

Combine flour baking powder.  Set this aside too.

Cream 1 cup butter with the white sugar until light and fluffy.  Add eggs and vanilla.  Beat for 1 minute.  Add the flour mixture alternately with the juice, beginning and ending with the dry ingredients.  Pour over the pineapple mixture in pan.

Bake at 350° for 40 minutes.  Do the toothpick test.

I don’t have a platter the right size to turn this cake upside down . . .

. . . so I don’t.

Linked to:

• Tempt My Tummy Tuesday
• Tasty Tuesday
• Tuesdays at the Table
• Tightwad Tuesday

I realize that banana bread isn’t difficult, but this one is particularly easy.  I need easy.  I often look at the spotty bananas and think to myself “if we weren’t so dad-gum busy I might make  some banana bread.”

Well, this recipe is saving all my near-death bananas from the trash can freezer!  And all because it makes up so quick and easy.

Easy Banana Bread

Preheat your oven to 350° and spray oil in 2 loaf pans.

You’ll need:

• 4 cups flour
• 2 tsp baking powder
• 1 tsp baking soda
• 1½ cups sugar
• 1/3 cup oil (I like to use coconut oil)
• 4 eggs
• 4 ripe bananas, sliced (see? easy!  no mash-measure-mess!)

Just put everything into a large bowl and mix it together.  Use your mixer if you have one.  Mix it well, then pour it into the two pans.  Bake @ 350° for about 50 minutes.  This makes a delicious loaf!  Very nice for breakfast or even dessert.

Linked to:

• Ultimate Recipe Swap

Y’all remember when I was so excited because Crockpot was gonna replace my stoopid ol’ broken Smarty-Pants-Pot?  How long ago was that?  Not very.

Two weeks ago to the day!  And today?  It broke!  Smartpot.  (rolls eyes)  I think not.

Really,  the Crockpot company ought to replace this replacement, but I just don’t need anymore broken “Smart”pots ‘round here.

I haven’t consulted w/Hubs on this one yet.  He’s still not home from work.

I’m just kinda crying about it.  I know I’m not supposed to cry over insignificant things like my dang dumbpot.  Tell that to my hormones.  Menopause doesn’t follow rules like “Thou shalt not cry over broken appliances.”

But maybe I am crying more because I had to fish through my White Chili to get the stinkin’ broken bit o’ pot that fell in as it broke!

See that quarter?  See that scowl on Mr. Washington’s face?  He’s a little angry with the Crockpot company for selling inferior goods.  See that tiny little thing that ruined my day?  GRRRRRRRR!!!

(sighs deeply)  Let’s move on, shall we?

Here’s a way better photo!  Not quality-wise, but content-wise.

This is Homemade M’wave Chocolate Pudding and it’s gonna save the day!

It’s very simple to make and it uses only wholesome ingredients.

Here at the ranch we call the pudding mix in the box “plastic pudding” but I think we’re just being nice.  ”Petroleum based chemical soup dressed up in drag with a bad wig and 6 inch spike heels” is probably a little closer to the truth.  Nasty stuff.  If you have any, don’t read the label, just don your haz/mat suit, grab a pair of tongs and bury the box 24 feet deep in your neighbors backyard.

Anyhoo, here’s how to make the wholesome kind.

Homemade M’wave Chocolate Pudding

These directions are for a small, medium or Family size bowl of pudding.  Just use the 1st amount for small, 2nd amount for medium, 3rd amount for Family size.  Keep with the same column though!

• (1/3 C)  (2/3 C)  1 Cup sugar
• (1/4 C)  (1/2 C)  3/4 Cup cocoa powder
• (3 T) (1/4 C + 2 T)  ½ Cup + 1 Tablespoon cornstarch
• (1/4 t) (½ t) 3/4 teaspoon salt
• (2 C) (4 C) 6 Cup milk
• (1 t) (2 t) 1 Tablespoon vanilla

In either a medium, large or real big glass bowl (check to make sure it fits in your m’wave first) combine the first 4 ingredients.  Stir the milk in until it’s smooth (or as smooth as you can make it).

Microwave on high for three minutes.  Stir well.  Microwave for 4 – 8 minutes, until thickened, stirring after every minute.  Please don’t take the bowl out of the m’wave to stir it unless there just isn’t room, and if you have to take it out be very careful.  After a while the pudding is lava-esque and could give you a bad burn.

Once it’s nice and thick stir in the vanilla.  Let it cool for a few minutes on the counter, then put it in the fridge for a couple of hours.  Check on it every half hour or so, give it a stir, be sure to taste it every time, just to make sure!

Linked to:

• Food on Friday
• Fight Back Friday

Alright, I really messed up.  I ate sugar and made myself sick.  Physically ill.  I feel like a kid who has tried chewing tobacco for the first time.  My tummy is bad and my head is squishy and all my joints hurt.

I am a ridiculously slow learner.  I just have to stay away from the sugar.  I may not be able to rout every molecule of processed sugar out of my diet but it’s not hard to keep the big helpings of it out of my mouth.  You know, like the amount found in, just for instance, 3 chocolate chip cookies.  Just sayin’.

But I can’t stop being a “sweet” mom.  I gotta give the treats and as we have found, if there are sweet treats I am gonna eat some of it.  So, it needs to not have sugar.

This is a recipe that we have had success with, and you’d never guess that it has no sugar and only 1/3 cup of peanut butter.

Peanut Butter Bars

• 1 cup rolled oats
• 1 cup very hot water
• ½ cup butter, softened
• ½ cup honey
• 1 egg
• 1 cup whole wheat flour
• ½ tsp baking soda
• 1/3 cup peanut butter
• 1 tsp vanilla

Preheat yer oven to 350°.  Soak oats in hot water in bowl.  Cream butter, honey and egg in bowl.  Add oats and the next 4 ingredients.  Mix well.  Spread into a greased 9×13.  Bake @ 350° for 10 – 15 minutes.  Let cool, cut into bars.

Very Yummy!!!

Here’s your shortcut back to the Ultimate Recipe Swap.

You’ll need:

• 2 cups white sugar
• 1 cup butter, melted
• 1/2 cup cocoa powder
• 1 teaspoon vanilla
• 4 eggs (use free range if you’re gonna lick your bowl)
• 1 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
• 1/2 teaspoon baking powder
• 1/2 teaspoon salt
• 1/2 cup chopped nuts
• 1- 12 year old helper who will work for licks (of the bowl)

Heat the oven to 350° and grease your 9×13. (I’ll let ya know if these work in the solar oven, I’m definitely gonna try it!) Mix all the ingredients in order.  Pour into the greased pan and bake for 30 minutes.

Lick all the utensils and the bowl before washing.

These come out kinda more cake-like than all gooey/sticky.  And I like the cake-like brownies best, so there ya go.

There are some no-no ingredients in the following two recipes and I don’t know how to get around them, just yet, but we are gonna enjoy these foods anyway.

Easy No-Bake Lemon Cheesecake

• 2 pkg cream cheese, at room temp.( I think they are 8 oz. ea.)
• 2 cans Eagle Brand sweetened condensed milk
• ½ cup lemon juice
• 2 sleeves graham crackers, totally crumbled to bits
• 2 sticks butter, melted
• ½ cup sugar

Put the graham cracker crumbs into your 9 x 13, add the sugar and stir.  Now add the melted butter and mix & mush into a bottom crust.

Using your mixer, mix the lemon juice, milk, and cheese.  Pour over the crust and spread it out pretty, put some Saran Wrap over it and stick it into the fridge for 3 hours.  

Go lick all the spoons, beaters and scrapers.  Or let the kiddies do it.

Now wash the dishes you used and fix supper, try not to think about the cheesecake in the fridge.

Meanwhile, back at the Ranch Dip 

• 2 pints Ranch Dip
• 2 small cans diced Chile Peppers, drained (I think they are 4 oz. ea.)
• 1 cup cheddar cheese, shredded
• 1/3 cup bacon bits
• a few shakes of Tabasco, not much

Stir it up good.  Taste it.  Add a little more bacon bits, and stir some more.  Taste it again, realize you forgot the Tabasco, add that, stir again.  Taste some more.  Get out some white corn chips to give it a fair taste.  Cover the bowl with Saran Wrap before you eat any more.  Put it in the fridge until time for the party.  Accept compliments graciously.